Once I had a hairy mop,
A curly, furry crop,
Hair today - gone tomorrow,
Just one strand
I’d like to borrow.

My Kingdom for a hair,
It really is not fair,
Some have got it;
Some have lost it,
Why should I despair?

Like Warnie, Loz and Mo,
It’d be nice to buy a ‘fro,
Even a hair here and there,
There’s plenty out there to share!

‘Bald eagle’, ‘chrome dome’,
There’s nothing on our pate,
Yes, you don’t need a comb,
But with the ladies we don’t rate.

Some say ‘bald is beautiful’,
Some say ‘bald are virile’,
But trust me it’s all a ruse,
Just a big excuse,
We’re really only… man refuse.

So c’mon baldies, let’s share the bare.
O, Dome Sweet Dome!